Husbands and Wives
Husbands and Wives Ephesians 5:22-33
In chapter 4 Paul told the Ephesians to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Once saved by the blood of Jesus, we become children of God. We are to live out our lives acting like children of God.
Here in chapter 5 we’re told to be imitators of God, to avoid sinful behavior, to live spirit filled lives. Now we look at how God wants the husband and wife relationship to be like.
Comic Illustration you may have heard:
In Our Marriage Everything is 50/50
I Cook, He Eats
I Wash, He Wears
I Shop, He Pays
There are a lot of jokes floating around about husbands and wives. If I was to walk up to someone and give personal relationship advice to them, I’d probably be told to mind my own business. We tend to stay out of other people’s business.
Thankfully this is not from me, it’s from God the Father, and he is getting in our business. Because our business is His business.
This is not marital advice on how to live a happy long lasting marriage and have a happy home. A happy home is the byproduct of living this wonderful life by God’s instructions.
The goal is to show Jesus and act like children of God in all things we do and in all relationships. We follow God’s instruction and do what is pleasing to Him.
This is not just good relationship advice, these are actual commands from God on how to live.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
Ephesians 5:22
Wives Submit to Your Husbands
Ephesians 5:22-24
- Submit: to yield oneself to the authority or will of another; to defer to or consent to abide by the opinion or authority of another; obey, be obedient; bring under control.
- Everything the wife is, she is for her husband. She does this voluntarily out of love and respect for Christ.
- Wives do this “as unto the Lord” or for the Lord. Because they love the Lord. And respect Him. They are God’s children.
- The husband and wife relationship is a picture of the Christ and church relationship.
- 1 Corinthians 11:3 “But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.”
- Does the wife submit, in everything, to the husband? The short answer is yes. Vs 24. But.. there may be exceptions to this:
- In 1 Peter 2:13-17, we are instructed to be in submission to our government and authorities. We follow the law of the land and honor the King, he says. But, in Acts 5:29 “Peter says we obey God rather than men.” The rulers told them to stop preaching. He disobeyed what he said in 1 Peter.
- If the husband leads his wife to disobey God, the wife can gladly say “I must obey God rather than you.”
- Sometimes husbands make wrong choices. Wives also give wise counsel.
Christ is the head of our church. And we willfully and joyfully follow His instructions and guidance. We are in total submission to His will for our lives. He gave His life for His church. He loves us and every instruction He gives us is good. We praise Him and love Him. This is also the husband and wife relationship.
By worldly standards, if someone is submitting or subject to another, the other would need to rule or be the ruler. This is not the case in God’s plan for the order of the home. This is a submissive and love relationship, not a subject and ruler relationship. Any man that thinks he is his wife’s ruler is in direct conflict with the will of God. The word rule or ruler is not mentioned here.
Husbands Love Your Wives Ephesians 5:25-32
- Love: this is word agape: A selfless and unselfish love. A giving and sacrificial love. A love of the will as well as the heart. A love of commitment as well as of affection. This is John 3:16 love. This is God’s love. This is the love Christ has for His church.
- Husbands are commanded by God to love their wives like Chirst loves His church. And gave himself for it. Again, comparison of husbands and wives to Christ and His church.
- A husband is supposed to give everything he’s got to make sure his wife has what she needs to grow in Christ. To live a holy, set apart life as a child of God.
- Just like a husband takes care of himself, he is to take care of his wife’s needs both physical and mental.
- Husbands and wives become one: 1 Peter 3:7 “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”
“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”
EPHESIANS 5:28
Husbands and Wives Follow These Instructions Ephesians 5:33
- He restates the command to both husbands and wives.
For husbands and wives to live out their lives in the manner that God has commanded they both need to be believers. It’s critical that believers marry believers. It’s critical that we teach our children to marry believers. To live out this life of submitting and loving, we must have God’s help. We can’t do this on our own. Without Jesus we don’t have God’s help. Without Jesus we are not children of God.
2 Corinthians 6:14-18 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you. And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.”
Are you living out these commands from God?
Wives are you submitting and respecting?
Husbands are you loving and nurturing?
Are you in Christ? Are you a believer?
“Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”
1 Peter 3:7